So, my lovelies – I have always been honest about being a curvy size 12. I have a tummy, which I’ve artfully hidden in photos – until now. I also have a large scar.
The reason for my tummy is not because I’m lazy (well, I am) or I eat all the food (well, I do) – even when I was a size 8, I had a tummy… because of my scar. I wear that scar proudly, because I wouldn’t be earth side without it.
When I was a size 8 – after major abdominal surgery. Twice. I suffer from Crohn’s disease (IBD – inflammatory bowel disease) – I have been sick since I was 14, was diagnosed at 21, have had countless procedures and two major surgeries – at my sickest, I was 45kgs (sorry – the next image is gross, but a necessary part of this message).
Apart from the surgery, Crohn’s has affected my life enormously. Luckily I’ve been well for a while, but when I’m sick it’s debilitating and extremely painful – studies rank IBD as the fourth most painful disease in the world. Not to mention poop!
It took me YEARS to come to terms with my scar. No exercise will ever lead to a six pack as every muscle group in my stomach has been cut through multiple times. So, I have a tummy – but does that mean I don’t feel incredibly sexy? NOT A CHANCE!
Learning to love my body just the way it is, to overcome poor body image AND to share myself as a companion with a significant, permanent scar is the most empowering thing I have ever done. If this assists even one person to positively accept their body, I’ll be thrilled.
Your Phoebe Mae xoxo